“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God.”
(Matthew 5:9)
It seems our world has never been more stressful. The 24-hour news cycle, intolerance of
different views, and attacks against Christianity. This stress can, and does, have effects on
individuals and can lead to various critical behaviors where the person in
crisis can become a threat to themselves and others. This is Part-1 of a three part series on dealing
with disruptive people, what causes them to be disruptive, and how to
de-escalate the disruption.
Whether a person is just normally odd, or just being a
troublemaker, people will say, “There’s one in every crowd.” If you have more than a few people in your
congregation, then this is probably true.
It may be a church member, just someone visiting, or protesters across
the street. It’s possible it’s a
conversation that turned into an argument, or someone with an axe to
grind.
We do live in a world where there are lots of needs, and people
don’t always express their needs in a healthy way. So, a disruptive person is someone who has a
need but is not able to express that need in an appropriate manner. Also, controlling the way you react and
controlling yourself in a situation is probably more important than trying to
control another person.
If you can control your own behavior then you will be in a better
situation to meet the need. Always try
to be an ally. As a believer we know
that the underlying need is to have Jesus Christ as Savior. So our goal is to de-escalate any
conflict, try to meet a physical, emotional, or safety need, and to meet the
spiritual need for Jesus Christ.
One of the most severe aspects of a behavioral emergency is the possibility
of violence and subsequent harm to the sufferer and others. One article reports that nearly 70% of
behavioral emergencies lead to injuries to someone through attempted assault or
from other actions. [1] So,
it is vitally important that the situation is diffused as soon as
possible.
Indication that a behavioral emergency is about to become violent
include:
1) Pacing
2) Yelling
3) Making threats
4) Clenched teeth or fists
Whatever the form of potential disruption, we want to be Peacemakers
to cool heated tempers and to diffuse the situation. Paul tells us in Romans
14:19, “So then we pursue the things which make for peace and the building
up of one another.” Our tool for
this is verbal de-escalation.
Verbal De-escalation is more than just a tool for emergencies. Being a peacemaker is a lifestyle. It begins with letting God’s word shape our
attitudes toward people, how we feel and think about them. It requires awareness and self-control.
Initially, all security team members should be trained in
this. Then verbal de-escalation training
should be made available to all teachers and ministry leaders in the
church. They all should be taught to
practice and make verbal de-escalation a part of their lives.
In my next post we will take a look at identifying potentially
disruptive people and the five most common causes.
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